finally, we have decided on a date. it would either be may 28 or 30 if i’d really go for the CS operation. but in case the baby wants her freedom earlier than those dates, i might try to do it the normal, usual way. if the doctor would allow it. if my body would allow it.
i will have to see my new OB on saturday, as soon as we arrive in negros. then i am guessing she’d advise me to have a pelvimetry, or the pelvic bone xray to check on my pelvic bone, if it’s big enough to accommodate my baby.
i have grown accustomed to the discomfort and inconvenience. i just tell myself it’s gonna be a few more weeks. my only consolation for now is that while the baby is still safely tucked inside my tummy, i only have one wailing child to attend to, raf. hahaha. i know it’s gonna be a circus once there’ll be two of them asking for attention already. i am silently hoping that the husband won’t start on a new job very soon so he can take care of the eldest while i bond with the newborn.
i told him that after this one, i wouldn’t entertain thoughts of having a third child. i mean, of course, kids are blessing but i am also thinking of our stability and the future. we just can’t say, bahala na, on this matter. i want to give my children the best of what we can offer, and not to sacrifice their education and other needs, just because we can’t afford it. and besides, i’ve been traumatized by this pregnancy that i am not sure i’d survive the next one. hahaha.
so now we are waiting, waiting, waiting.