the thing about delivering a baby for the second time is that you already know what you’re gonna go through, especially in my case when i’d have another C-section. with only four days to go before i’d have my tummy sliced again, i am torturing myself with horrid thoughts of enema, anesthesia and of course, the post-birth pain.
although it would be a great relief to finally release the little one inside me and feel light (and almost normal) again, i can’t help but be scared. and it’s weird to be scared. hehehe. plus, the fact that i have to leave the little boy behind because he can’t stay in the hospital adds to my anxiety. you see, i haven’t been away from him ever since. well, since he moved in with us, that is. i would have wanted him to be around but i know too that the hospital isn’t really a good place for him to stay in for four days.
so yeah, pretty soon the journey would end. and a new life would have to begin for me, with my little angel. ah, wish me luck.